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The book is unwell. It sends its best wishes to all readers who have been asking after it. It may be back soon. It is hard to say.

In the meantime, here is a list of my adventures with the book so far:

Hated by the book

Murdering my darling

Visiting hours

Going for coffee

Leaving the house

In the waiting room

Packing to leave

Ordering drinks in Spanish

Lost for words

Peace offering

The Milkmaid

Identical pizza crusts

The lullaby

You could quit

Signs of life

In the bookshop

The damage of haste

The T-shirt idea

Jealous

The other book

Did you miss me?

Autobiography

There isn’t a plan

Wake up!

Talking about cutting

Under the fingernails

Something’s come up

Being Very Funny on Twitter

Terrible work

Letting go

You will never be ready

What the internet thinks

We’re done

Poets in the audience

Excuses

The new book

Nothing to say