A beautiful thing

‘Hello,’ says the book. ‘I’ve missed you.’ ‘I’ve missed you, too,’ I say. I look at the book for a … More

Nothing

‘What are you doing?’ says the book. ‘Nothing.’ ‘Doesn’t look like it.’ ‘Listening to the cricket,’ if you must know. … More

‘You good?’ says the book. ‘Yup,’ I say. ‘Good, thanks. All good.’ ‘You’re good. So you’re good,’ the book says. … More

’Have you seen my coat?’ says the book. ’Nope. You seen mine?’ ’Nope. You look tired. Are you tired?’ ’You … More

‘What’s happening?’ ’Nothing,’ I say. ’Doesn’t look like nothing,’ the book says. ‘It looks like you’re brooding. Are you brooding?’ … More

‘Something looks different,’ the book says. ‘Have you been shaving again?’ ‘You can talk,’ I say. ‘As it happens, … More

‘What’s up?’ says the book. ‘It’s nothing. Really. I’m fine,’ I say. ‘For a person with their head in their … More

‘Are you afraid?’ says the book. ‘What are you talking about?’ ‘Are you?’ ‘Have I upset you in some way?’ … More

‘Happy new year,’ says the book. ’And to you, too,’ I say. ’You all right?’ says the book. ’Fine,’ I … More

‘Good Christmas?’ I say. ’Fairytale,’ the book says. ‘Grimm.’ ’Are you here all week?’ ’Unlike some of us.’ ’It was … More

‘So I was thinking,’ the book says. ‘Going anywhere nice for Christmas?’ ’Do you want a lift somewhere?’ I say. … More

‘What have you learned, do you think?’ the book says. ‘Do you mind, I’m trying to have a bath!’ ‘Now … More

‘Do you mind if I ask you a question?’ the book says. ‘Why are you wearing my slippers?’ I say. … More

‘What else are you guilty about?’ ‘Most things,’ I say. ‘It doesn’t stop with poetry, you know. Or those unread … More

’Anything else?’ the book says. ’What do you mean?’ ’That you want to tell me?’ There is a long silence, … More

‘What else are you not telling me?’ says the book. ‘Nothing,’ I say. The book rolls its eyes, gives a … More

‘What you reading?’ says the book. ‘Nothing.’ ‘No need to be shy,’ says the book. ‘Go on, what is it?’ … More

‘What’s wrong?’ says the book. ‘Nothing,’ I say. ‘Liar.’ ‘Am not.’ ‘Are.’ ‘Aren’t.’ ‘Pants on fire. You’re hopeless. You should … More