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‘Have you thought about acting?’

‘I’m sorry?’

‘Acting. You’re good enough. Bit of training and you’d be away.’

‘What?’

‘Or comedy. You know you’ve always wanted to.’

‘I would rather boil my hands.’

‘You’re just saying that.’

‘Or that T-shirt idea.’

‘Please don’t mention that.’

‘But you could, you know. You know you could. You just have to start.’

‘This is complete balls, even by your standards.’

‘I was just putting forward -‘

‘Do you think you could go now? I’m trying to work.’

‘If you insist.’

‘I do.’

‘OK then.’

‘OK then.’

‘Will you call me?’

‘You know I will.’

‘You won’t.’

‘I will.’

‘That’s what you always say.’