Today is the last day of NaBloPoMo, that month in the year when someone decides it is a nice idea for the bloggers amongst us to attempt a blog post every day. On paper this did not make a great deal of difference to me, as I had been trying to post something every day since about mid-July. I’m still wondering if it was a good idea. Not because I suddenly hate blogging, or because my stats have plummeted (they have been up and down since about April, and I am jiggered if I know why), but because I am really, really tired. Again, just so I am clear: not tired of blogging, or the sense of connection that it brings (especially not that), but just plain and simple tired. So I wonder if December (and even January?), and the months beyond it might be a little quieter on the blogging front. I think they might have to be. This isn’t a notice to quit, or waving the white flag. But it is a moment. For taking stock, for re-evaluating, and making some changes in order to make this whole thing more manageable. Basically, I need to refuel. I do have it in mind to keep going with The Book series of blog posts, and with Lifesaving Poems. But to do that I need to noodle around for a bit, drift, catch up on some sleep. In short, take a break from my beloved screen(s). As Ken Smith once noted in his list of things to do when his poems would not arrive, the way forward is often to do nothing that looks like writing: ‘…sleeping a lot and dreaming; encountering strangers; recording strange events, consulting oracles, collecting images, getting drunk, staying sober, attempting to cleanse the doors of perception or forget what I know.’ I don’t know what the new pattern will be (maybe once a week; maybe less often than that?), but I think a pattern is required. I’m tired, you see.
I am grateful, more than I can ever say, to you for reading this. I do not take it for granted.
But I am tired.
I’ll see you later.